Navigating parenthood when you have a child with autism (let alone two!) is daunting. I realized early on that I would constantly be knocking on doors, pushing through barriers and advocating, advocating, advocating. When my husband, Danny, and I received that first diagnosis almost 23 years ago – Autism was still the most frightening and misunderstood term, and the future seemed, at best, uncertain, and at worst, bleak.

Growing up Bobby (25) was constantly on sensory overload and every aspect of school, community, and life was challenging and something to overcome. That was when the autism prevalence was 1 in 110 – it is now 1 in 36 – and all the tantrums and difficulty communicating made the rest of the world stare at us with confusion and often disgust. Katie (23) had no words at 3, and her tantrums were epic, not surprising now, as she has so much to say and is in constant talking and sharing mode. Hours and hours, and days and days of speech therapy, occupational therapy, social work and counseling and special education; as well as six schools between them and massive amounts of parent advocacy (not to mention SO much insurance and money) have helped our family become relatively average in the new world of autism acceptance. Katie is a dynamic, opinionated woman, and a junior in college at Davis & Elkins College, West Virginia (something even 4 years ago I thought was completely out of reach with her autism and ADHD diagnosis). Bobby is a talented artist, kind, sweet, thoughtful and so comfortable in his own skin, a high school graduate, fully independent and navigating life in the city, and a full time federal employee!

We were never shy about telling our story – we wanted the world to know the challenges and the supports needed and the unique perspectives of our autistic kids. Read about Bobby at age 10 as profiled in the Washington Post Magazine, and we were always ready to help causes that supported change in our community for sensory-friendly programming and accessibility – read about our family’s adventure with our wonderful friends at the SPY Museum in The Washington Post.

Personally, I’ve watched my career take a turn from association and nonprofit management and development and communications to the realm of special education and disability advocacy. I’ve served as the Director of Development and Communications at the wonderful Ivymount School and as Executive Director of the DC Association for Special Education, before Best Buddies came knocking and it was a moment when I realized that everything from my professional expertise was colliding with my personal and family experiences, and I was right where I needed to be to do the most good! My passion has long been supporting the movement for inclusion, and I have been so proud to be the State Director for Best Buddies Capital Region: Virginia & DC, not too mention, my kids (now very much adults) love being members of the Best Buddies family.

Best Buddies in Virginia & DC serves over 4,000 individuals with developmental disabilities through one-to-one friendships, supported employment, inclusive living, family support and leadership development. I know that many of us, as parents and community members, worry about the “cliff” and how people with disabilities who don’t have meaningful work and friendships will be able to build productive, independent and happy lives. I’m so excited to be leading our Best Buddies efforts to CHANGE this trajectory for countless friends and families in our community and making Autism Acceptance Month a time to celebrate all that the Autistic community can achieve!

Have questions about Best Buddies – tag me at: MollyWhalen@bestbuddies.org